Fili’s world

“The Dutch hate the Germans, the British hate the French, the Scots hate the English, but everybody hates the Israelis”. I smiled back and winked at Senay, but then I heard a girl on my right saying in Hebrew “Did you hear what that woman just said?”. I quickly turned to the horrified origin with the shocked face and explained it was just Senay’s way of teasing me, but that wouldn’t help. The two Israeli girls kept throwing nasty looks at the British journalist as we exchanged Israeli Vietnam tips.

Busy busy Hanoi. Not same same at all with Thailand and Lao, a surprising refreshing difference, and probably what I needed.

“Can I have a window sit, please?”. The girl at the counter stared at me with an examining look, then bursted with a strong laugh. “I think you’ll be okay” she giggled. “Oh, no” I automatically started thinking, what have I gotten myself into now. The LuangPrabang airport was totally deserted, and there was nobody around - not even tourists that might be flying back with me to Vientiane. Maybe I got there too early, maybe I was too late? But she said she think I’ll be fine - did she understand what I asked? Was she laughing at me? I examined my ticket and read everything at least 3 times. There was no sign of a seat number anywhere, and the ticket looked like it was painted by a 5 year old kid with the big LaoAir logo. I remember hesitating for a while before being able to sign up for a LaoAir ticket. I just couldn’t picture the Lao air company, and was a bit worried about what kind of airplanes and maintenance policy a company like that might have. Minutes pass, flight time is here and still nobody. I try and calm myself, but a sudden rush of I-don’t-understand-what’s-going-on panic was taking over me. A door opens and I’m escorted by a short lady to the back of the tiny airport to what appeared to be the smallest commercial-flight plane I’ve ever seen. Oh, shit, no way this is it! Ofcourse there’s no window seat, since they’re all window seats! Behind me, 2 Lao people show up from no-where and join me. Right in front of me I see the two pilots sitting in the cockpit. A small greeting from the captain and we’re off. What a great ride! My own private jet! I knew people don’t use airtravel that much in Lao, but I never thought it would be like this. Sven, the owner of Martin’s Pub, who I talked to the night before, told me the only way to travel is by land, since that’s the only way you get to feel the distances. True, yet so wrong. It was an incredible, breathtaking experience. We were flying so low I could see and feel everything that was going on the ground. Mountains, lakes, rivers, rainforests, villages, people - it felt like a dream. Every once in a while the pilot would open up his windows, throw all his cashew nuts trash out and give it a nice spit against the strong breeze that kept flowing in. No cabin pressure needed, I guess. A total rush.

I met Senay (pronounced very similar to Sheyne) at the Hanoi airport and we’ve spend out time in Vietnam ever since. I really like Hanoi, because it’s much more different than I initially expected.

The traffic is usually the first thing that you confront when you get to Hanoi. I take back everything I ever said about the way Israelis drive. I’ve never seen anything quite like it. It’s a tourist cliche but you just can’t seem to get over the horn business. Everybody uses the horn all the time, without any direct relation to what’s happening around them, and it just doesn’t stop. Forget Bangkok’s air pollution, the noise pollution in Hanoi is ten times worse. I just wonder how they feel when they go visit other countries, what would they do without their precious horns. The second thing you notice is the need to negotiate everything and the very intrusive way they offer their services. Getting out of a cab in the bus station we were surrounded with masses of people trying to carry our bags and lead us to different vehicles. I’ve never seen anything quite like it.

“Girlfriend?” she asked, looking very worried. “No, just a friend” I replied, but that was too much of a long English sentence for her to understand. She wasn’t sure what would be okay, but she still tried everything. Oh, those Thai naive massages are nothing compared to what I’ve been offered and almost molested into doing in that Lonely Planet’s “only descent original Vietnamese massage place”. I’ve been offered the handjob and blowjob moves and just barely kept the woman from taking her clothes off. Everytime I refused her she would look at the wall separating from the second room where Senay was having her massage and mumble “oh, girlfriend, girlfriend”.

“Lazy” and “Tired” are my nicknames right now. We haven’t been doing too much, but I just don’t feel like moving around alot. The first day, coming to Hanoi I was exhausted, but still we went to the Water Puppet show and even sat down with the locals to watch animals mistreated at the Hanoi old-fashioned Circus. Second day, we started out with the awful (Lonely Planet’s “excellent”) Women’s museum, but quickly changed to sit down in the Army Hotel’s swimming pool. Chillout and eating is just about what I’m up to lately, relying on my Thai upbringing, and that seems weird yet unexplainably interesting and funny to the superenergetic Senay. She’s leaving tomorrow to see as much as she can in the week she has in Vietnam. I’ll catch up on my lounging on some of the local islands.

Just when you think that you’re stuck, something happens. We came to Halong City yesterday by a 4 hour bus ride from Hanoi, planning to take a ferry to Cat Ba Island through the scenic UNESCO treasured Halong Bay islands. The view was gorgeous, but there was no ferry to be found. All we got from the locals was nasty looks as we rejected their offers for a 80$-120$ cruise. A group of Americans was walking by with a Vietnamese guide and Senay rushed over to see what they were up to. We spent the next 4 hours chilling out on their boat and seeing some amazing caves on the way for very small cash. Just goes to show you… Things have a way of working out…

(Note - most Vietnamese ISPs seem to dislike my Spymac email account for some reason, so I’m not able to login. I’d like to think it’s the communist control or something exotic like that, but it could be nothing. Anyways, I’ll keep trying to find a place that will allow me to log on.)